I can't explain this feeling
I think about it everyday
And even though we've moved on
It gets so hard to walk away

I can't forget how we used to be
Our life from day to day
Hoping maybe you'll come back
And though I tell myself not to be afraid
To move on but it seems I can't
But no other man has given me attention
It ain't the same as your affection

I Remember when you came with me that night
We said forever, that you would never let me go
But here I am again
With nothing left inside
No I don't wanna but I gotta let you go

You're the one mistakeI really didn't mind
So beautiful, unmercifully
Took me down

its been exactly a year since i got to really know you. and what have i to say? alot.

we spent most of this year actually not talking. its sad isnt it. the first four months were really great and yeah i thank you for every single moment of it. actually i planned to start talking to you again on this day but i guess, i better not. just wanna say those four months had been really great. there were ups and downs of course. really bad turns and stuff but well, we never quarrelled before. it isnt good in a sense but yet, good in another.

i just wanna thank you for being so nice and caring and loving and sweet to me, tho i was such an ass. thinking back now, i know that i had been really bad and i really dont deserve your love. thanks for being there when i needed someone so much yah. thanks for being a pillar of strength, thanks for cheering me up always, thanks for never forsaking me, thanks for showering me with concern and love, thanks for standing by me, thanks for never giving up on me yeah. thanks for every single thing. every little thing. thinking of it now, i cant believe i actually said that you dont freaking care about me at all. when you actually knew more about me than i expected you to. i cant believe how bad i was. to push you away, to say stuff that were so bad, to make you upset so often and all, to totally not care about how you feel and would feel. i have only myself to blame for the outcome of this whole thing.

there are so many regrets. like why did i do this and that. why did i think this way and that. why did i throw someone that loved me so much away. why did i not cherish someone so sweet and nice to me. why did i and why did i and why did i? it goes on and on, neverending. and then

"you have lost him. thats it. you could have done this and that this and that. but you did not. you threw him away and thats it. its over. way over. so stop thinking about it"

well. i really am undeserving of your love i guess. remember i told you that i wasnt worth your time and love? that you deserve someone much better? remember what was your reply? i'll never forget what you said. never.

"anyway. if u think ure not worth it, its not true. cos u really mean a lot to me. and i dont deserve anything better. cos ure already the best. if u dont dare to really love me its ok. i'll understand."

thank you. really. so so so super much.

its gonna be 10th april one day and then 1st june and then 10th august. im not gonna type this kinda emo post anymore. i just want to tell you that i'll never forget you. cause youre really the best that i ever had. and sorry for not treasuring you. sorry for throwing you away, for hurting you, for making you upset, for making you sad and down and confused and helpless, for not understanding you and for pushing you away.. i cant believe that you were so nice and tolerant and sweet regardless of my unreasonable personality. its indeed my loss, that i let go of you. you were everything that i ever wanted.

but yeah. i know youre happy with her. and truly, shes a much better girlfriend than i am and shes so much better also. she definitely deserves you more than i do. yah. all the best to you both (:

so today i want to thank you, whoever you are. for making my life, at least this short period of my life, wonderful. thanks for everything you have done for me. thank you for everything, really really. i have never had the chance to really thank you. and i guess i cant ever thank you enough. thank you for everything that you have done for me yah, for your love, for the times we spent, all the movies and outings and messaging and phone calls and yeah. every single thing. thank you for making those four months of my life unforgettable. thank you for the beautiful memories you left me. thank you for being in my life. i have learnt quite a lot from this whole thing and yupp, thank you. i really thank God for you (:

you were the sweetest, the nicest. simply, the best i ever had.

really, thank you.