i overheard my grandmother talking on the phone last night. it seems like one of her many brothers was in hospital. the last i heard was "he's on drip and hes taken his medication" i thought it was nothing really serious.

today at 10.50, i received a message from my mum saying that he had passed on. i was sad. for a moment i didnt know what to do. or how to react. i stoned for awhile. so what now? my temper was pretty short the whole day. and i know i was somewhat quiet for awhile. sorry peeps. it really got me thinking. yet another death. all the negative thoughts started flooding my mind. what if this, what if that. so on and on.

i felt much better during the hour long break. i felt pretty sick and wanted to sign out. apparently i couldnt cause charlotte dint pick up my call. school ended at 3.10. chatted for awhile with reena and shuhui and i headed for home. or rather, i went to auntie fengyi's house to pick joel first before coming home. i called my grandma, and she sounded so bad. from her voice, anyone can tell that shes been crying for so so long. chatted with auntie fengyi for awhile and i realised that granduncle hasnt passed on. he's in the midst of an operation. if the operation fails, we will lose him.

thank God theres still hope. all i can do now is to pray and hope that he'll be fine. hes suffering from liver failure. hes been referred to a hospital but he dint seek medical help and nobody knows. with his excessive drinking and smoking, his liver deterioted.

only God knows what will happen to him. i really hope that he'll be fine.

called mum and told her that granduncle is still alive. and she started telling me bout the past. the times when granduncle will always piggyback and carry me. cause you know, i hate to walk. she says that he loves me alot and dotes on me alot. and if my memory didnt fail me, i actually disliked him for a period of time cause his teasing always go kinda overboard and being a wilful and unreasonable kid then, i was always irritated and angry. hahah. and in the recent years, i haven't been visiting my greatgrandma's house. ive only been there once this year i think.

i have two greatgrandmas. and theyre still healthy. okay not really. greatgrandma 1 is , and ggm 2 isnt. and i seldom visit them. ive been spending too much time with my friends and all. i have neglected my family which is actually of utmost importance. i feel so very guilty now..

after exams, im gonna visit both my greatgrandmas. i cant wait to eat the kuehs that greatgrandma 1 makes (:

imagine if granduncle really passes on.. greatgrandma 1 will be seeing his son leave her..

i really really truly hope that he'll be fine..

to everyone who has read this post, please pray for my granduncle. he's only 40+. too young to go. too young. bring on the prayers please.